Compulsive Behaviors
When you’re no longer enjoying that which is pleasurable, you need to take a step back.
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Recover and Regain Control
Picture your favorite thing in life. It could be exercising, pizza, or coffee. Whatever it is, imagine removing all of the pleasure you get from your favorite thing. You might wonder why you would even entertain your favorite thing any longer. This is similar to the experience had by sufferers of compulsive behaviors.
Compulsive behaviors are activities a person performs with intent and repetition, without pleasure. Commonly linked to the more widely known OCD—Obsessive Compulsive Disorder—the pleasure from the activity is often replaced by the belief that the sufferer has to partake excessively in the activity. It becomes a compulsion.
Some experts believe compulsive behaviors to be a disorder that cannot be cured, we at City Gate take a more optimistic and realistic approach to helping you manage and recover from compulsive behaviors—especially those linked with sexual activities.
We lead with compassion, empathy, and a clear path to recovery. While we don’t promote a “cure all” for compulsive behaviors, we know what you go through every day isn’t easy, and we can help you live a full life again.
We invite you to check out our Resource page, and know we’re only a friendly phone call away.
What is Compulsive Sex Addiction?
When most people hear “sex addiction”, they think the act of intercourse has to be involved. This is farthest from the truth, especially when it comes to the combination of compulsive behavior and sexual obsession.
If a sex addict battles compulsive behaviors and obsessions, their life is likely preoccuped by everything sexual—thoughts, urges, fantasies, dreams, behaviors, propositions, entertainment, relationships, budget, and more. Therefore, the sex addict may be partaking in pornography and other forms of adult “entertainment”, excessive masturbation, fornication and adultery, S&M, online sex, unprotected sex, and other risky daily behaviors. Some gravitate to crossing legal or ethical boundaries.
Compulsive sex addiction can be extremely debiliating. It can overwhelm the sufferer’s profession, finances, and mental and physical health. And due to the link between general compulsive behaviors and obsessive compulsive disorder, the negative consequences can be accelerated compared to general sex addiction population..
It can be difficult for a sufferer of compulsive sexual behavior to determine when they should seek help. There are two observations that, if both met, should be all the encouragement you need to seek therapy.
- You’ve lost self-control over your sexual urges. Your determination to scale back sexual activity has deteriorated greatly or is very short-lived.
- If your family and/or friends have approached you about your compulsive behavior(s) or the side effects that are noticeable externally.
What’s most important about these observations is this—you still have a love for yourself, and you have a network of people who love you, too. This is a fundamental requirement for successful compulsive sexual behavior therapy.
While each therapy session is individually crafted to the unique individual, you can expect your path to success to include the following:
- Full assessment and diagnosis of compulsive behaviors, sex addiction, and other underlying issues
- Cognitive behavioral therapy which will help you adapt coping and control mechanisms without losing an enjoyable lifestyle
- Affirmations will help you not feel as isolated from loved ones, and you’ll accept every future urges or thoughts as another opportunity to better yourself
- Introspection and digging deeper into internal inclination will help you discover and manage the common, yet unnoticeable motivations and triggers behind your compulsive behaviors
Frequently Asked Questions
Compulsive sexual behavior can also be referred to as ‘Hypersexuality’. The usage of this term further emphasizes the frequency and dependency on the part of the sufferer to partake in the compulsive behavior. Like most compulsive behaviors, the sufferer experiences great amounts of distress from their constant fantasies, thoughts, and urges. This is commonly the first and most experienced negative consequence of hypersexuality, however, it can also be something that enables behavior because the sufferer feels helpless to the obsessions.
Yes, however, we have to specify that the belief that the sufferer “has” to partake in masterbation out of some form of fear, and that satisfying this fear is the only constant satisfaction experienced by the sufferer, has to be present in order for it to be a form of sex addcition. As noted earlier, there are some people with higher levels of hormones than most, and higer levels of masterbation tied to such a genetic trait shouldn’t be seen as a sex addiction sufferer.
This is a great question. Using alcohol as an example, addiction would refer to the process the sufferer went through that led them to become dependent on alcohol. This could include casual drinking, or drinking with the knowledge that he/she is predisposed to alcoholism. Compulsion, on the other hand, would be someone who feels that drinking is a required behavior to meet some form of end, such as feeling good or a fear of what would happen if they don’t partake.
